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Archive for October, 2008

i have butterflies in my stomach that can only be compared to christmas eve as a child (hopefully i will not vomit like i did as a child) my family is coming up tomorrow to have an engagement party at johnathan edwards winery in north stonington. not only my family, but all of friends from current work and past jobs will be there and a few people from my childhood. i am so fortunate to have so many people come out to celebrate and really cannot wait. and the best part is, i get to see my sister. my sister who lives in new jersey and works with sex offenders-hey someone has too- who i havent seen since we got engaged. i have magazines with tabs to show her, and she can finally see my ring. and i really seriously cannot wait, have i said that yet? can this day go any faster!!!

and its halloween! so boo! my boss asked what i was dressed up as and my costume this year is a poor grad student who just got engaged! approprate yes?

ohh and an update on a previous post

unfortuantly the pornographic “beef of the sea” has gone away and was replaced with this:

right out in front…isnt she lovely?

Happy WEEKEND!!!

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#163,988…

reason why i love my mom, as crazy as she is, this is a conversation we had this past weekend:

mom-“i know you and kevin are not all that concerned about pictures but i want an engagement picture.”

me-“well i figured there would be something good taken by someone this weekend at the party.”

mom-“but i think it should be a bit more professional-you know so i can put it in the newspaper”

me-“what newspaper?”

mom-“the kalamazoo gazette of coures!”

me-“mom we dont live there anymore…?…”

mom-“i know, but i want to show all the mean people that you grew up with, how fabulous you look and how exciting this all is.”

only my mom would come up with that!

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really? its the weekend?

after a whirlwind of a week that included, but was not limited to, classes, work, baseball, murder investigations, prepping for halloween at work, working on my first grad school paper, grocery shopping and getting ready for an engagement party. its FRIDAY! i haven’t been this excited about a friday in a while, well i was last week, but that was dampened a bit saturday morning. but have no fear, there will be nothing like that happening again at least not in the near future! why? because the crackheads are being evicted today-complete with police escort. that little tidbit almost made me want to call in sick to work. not that i wish any ill will on anyone but i think dead people is really that line that was crossed.

on another note, i have been emailing my sister over the past week about next weekend and our engagement party. my parents are having a wonderful party for us at a local vineyard. we have all sorts of people coming plus a majority of the family from dirty jersey. on monday my mom said she wanted me and mary and all the boys to stay at the house because, and this is how she said it “I want my girls home.” o.k not a problem but then she continued to say she wasn’t really sure about the sleeping arrangements, boys in one room girls in another…right then and there, i kinda started to have a problem. not a huge one, because i do respect my parents, but then again a semi-huge one because there is no way i can not sleep next to my fiance. the same person whom my dad gave permission to. by wednesday, she had come to her senses, at least where we are concerned. for my sister, not to sure yet and she is having a hard time grappling with why this is such a big deal. i think my favorite part of the entire conversation with mary all week is that we really need to take a look back and see how many instances where my mom said “your dad will not like it” and re-evaluate if really, it was her not liking it. Its almost like having a completely different outlook on how we were raised. but comical all the same!

i am looking forward to a weekend full of baseball, paper writing, leaf peeping and a class of wine! and really looking forward to a normal parking lot tomorrow morning!

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a brief update…

someone cleaned the blood off the front porch, and the cops were interviewing people all yesterday. the stompers are still upstairs though and they seem to “not know why” their roomate/dealer/whatever the hell you want to call it, was doing in the parking lot at 1:30 in the morning. i still have a sick feeling in my stomach, we cannot leave nick home alone, i think i have slept a total of ten hours in the last three days and true to my moms form, i told her what happened and she trumped my story with one of her own. its a talent of hers really! thanks to everyone for letting me vent!!

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my weekend…

friday afternoon, kevin and earned more cool parent props. we had nicks girlfriend over for pizza and a movie and nick even said…and i quote…”bethany even says you guys are cool parents” whoa! who would have thought we could have ever achieved parent status let alone “cool” parent status. so that was pretty great. 

saturday morning, nick woke us up saying that there was a bunch of yellow tape outside the window. that seemed odd, we started to roll out of bed and do our usual thing, feed the dog, take him out. until kevin stepped outside our back door and came across this:

now if you cannot make out what the trucks say, let me tell you, the long one in the back is the crime response mobile unit for the town and the shorter one is the state police (central division) crime investigation unit. why would they be there you ask? because the crack heads/stompers who live ABOVE me had a gentleman who, may or may not have been living with them, doing deals out in the parking lot, one deal went bad and he was stabbed to death. AT.MY.APARTMENT. we were unable to go out our front door because 1)it was part of the crime scene and 2) because of all the blood. our parking lot was completely roped off, which meant we could not leave until all of the cars were cleared and that part of the crime scene was cleared. we had to have nicks coach pick him up for his ten o clock game. eventually we were allowed to leave, we caught the last two innings of the game then brought nick to his moms house. the police were still here in the afternoon. kevin and i went grocery shopping and came back, police still here, then we went to get something sweet and came back to you guessed it, more police. i would have to say sometime around 8pm we were finally allowed to open our front door, i really shouldn’t have, there were blood smears on the wall, a large spatter at the front door on the cement and a cop sitting at the top of the stairs. then a few minutes later the two ladies and the vacant starring gentleman returned, i think they tried to clean what was left on the wall and the front step-not successfully i might add because it is still there! the crazy thing is, kevin totally knew something like this would happen. apparently they have lived here before and were evicted, when they moved back in the neighbors who have been here a while warned us about them.

the more i sit here in my apartment, my home, the more i become disturbed by the whole thing. i realize things like this happen all the time, and i cannot protect my family from the big bad world. but this man died above me from a stab wound that happened right outside my door, his blood is still outside. my address was broad-casted to the entire state of connecticut, not to mention the live shot of my apartment all morning long! thank god my mom was visiting michigan this weekend. but how does one deal with this? i feel completely irrational thinking that this is even bothering me, but it is, its under my skin, there are visual reminders and the stompers are still upstairs. shouldn’t they be gone? evicted or something, i am sure there is something in the lease that does not allow this kind of thing, i did read through it and saw no mention of murder per say, however there were other things less sever that could result in eviction and if they don’t leave, we will and i do not think we should be punished for breaking our lease. a document we signed with the understanding that everyone who lived here signs the same thing and would have to adhere to those same things which should equate to a safe environment, at least one free of oh i don’t know, murders?!? gah i am so having a hard time with this. its a good thing that i got my birthday present early and was able to take such a great shot of the cop vehicles, in fact my new camera could have put all the investigators cameras to shame.

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thursday thoughts…

i have many many things swirling around in my head right now and think the best thing to do is to write them out, maybe then i will have room to unravel my brain a bit:

  • last week kevin emailed all of nicks teachers just asking how he is doing in class. he did this in part because there are no conferences until december and this time last year we had already had a conference and a few “special” meetings with teachers ( i use the term special loosely). we have received two emails back, both of which state nick is a pleasure to have in class and that his grade is at least a b, if not better. their only complaint is that he does become chatty at times, but they are able to refocus him before it becomes too much of a problem. Flash back to last year and he was getting detentions! what a huge huge turnaround for that kid… makes me proud, so in a way it feels like our report card as parents is not bad right now!
  • i have a paper due in class in a few weeks. this is the first paper that i will write for grad school and the first paper i have written in oh say 8 years! i am finding that i am stressing about format, the level of my writing, how am i to cite this and a small voice in the back of my head telling me that the professor is going to look at this and laugh you out of grad school.
  • i have learned that you really cannot rely on ordering books online during a semester, they never seem to get here on time and they never seem to be the right book. not to mention, i just received “Whats the matter with Kansas?” and NEVER. ORDERED. IT! nick keeps asking “Jen, what is the matter with Kansas?” my response is “Not sure nick, i wasn’t even supposed to get that book”
  • i have also learned that no matter how cheap said online book is, the amount of hassel that goes into trying to rectify the situation of receiving a book you did not order is soo not worth it!
  • if i have been vigorously trying to change my mailing address and information on a credit card bill for the past year, and they haven’t picked up on it, and if i didn’t receive a bill this month, is it my fault they wont get paid?
  • the past week, i noticed i wasn’t feeling right, no reason as to why, just not right, maybe its the blues, maybe it was hormones but last night i talked to my parents and my sister and realized, i am a bit homesick, and i think its because i haven’t seen my dad in a very long time, or my sister for that matter, hell just throw my mom in there too!
  • i may also be jealous, my parents are on a plane to michigan to go and visit ‘home’ we have been in connecticut for five years now and the rest of family has made numerous trips back, i have only made two, the last being two years ago-there is not much left in kalamazoo, but i always hear kevin talking about how he did this and that in newington growing up and i wish that i could share the same type of stories, plus i just wish i could go back to that bakery in downtown and get one last clown cookie*.
  • my birthday is coming up, part of me just wants to skip it, part of me really doesn’t care, and part of me wants a giant, blow out, keg type of party. all three of these things are not going to happen, but still turning 30 is looming and i like to think i am where i should be at this point in my life, and i need to remind myself that i never envisioned past 18.
  • the fall weather really really makes me yearn to go horseback riding. or just not be at work!
  • and one more little irksome thought…i just got an email on myspace from a sorority sister, who happened to also be my big sister, who proceeded to tell me that she cannot believe that she had to find out i was engaged on myspace. um step back one minute…haven’t seen her in over two years, haven’t actually had a conversation with her for more than that time unless you count the mass emails she sends out to everyone in her address book all about her son. i. hate. mass. emails. oh and by the way every thing is not always about this one particular person-yes everyone can laugh, i was in a sorority, it is something you would never know by looking at me!

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since we just added water and made this little family, it feels like a blink of an eye, but when i really think about it there was a lot of hard work too. here are a few changes…

  • i can say no and just by saying ‘no’ i do not have to have any other reason!
  • last year for all of nicks school paperwork and contact information we *insert mostly me, but sometimes nick* really were not sure what my official title would be (not his mom and not step mom and dads girl friend really didn’t fit. This year i am a parent.
  • aluminum foil+broiler=flames and lots of smoke and alarms
  • let me see your homework and did you do your homework at two completely different questions
  • gold bond medicated powder is a gift from god
  • it takes exactly 2.5 minutes for a large bag of smartfood to be devoured by a 12 year old
  • There are numerous ways to get a pencil that is stuck in the bathroom drain out of said bathroom drain
  • chewing nails off till they are nubbins can result in those nails becoming embedded into ones gums, after at least a week of “ow my gums hurt” and “why do they bleed all the time” i have learned to be a dental hygienist and floss out the offending nail
  • i have spent more time contemplating what type of cup/jock strap to get as opposed to what kind of bra i am going to get
  • i have learned that i am way more patient then i ever thought possible

i have also learned that relationships are very hard work, but the ones that are the best require the most work!! Here’s to another year!! I love my boys!

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the vulture…

today was the first time kevin and i went furniture shopping. nick needs a new dresser, so after his game we headed over to raymore and flanigan. before we entered the store, kevin made a comment that the salespeople were like vultures here and they just do not leave you alone. as soon as we stepped into the store a sales women swooped down upon us shoved a flyer in our hands and ushered us to the kids section. half way through the store she had already decided that we needed a solid wood, made in america, discontinued chest of drawers that we could save for a life time and use in our guest bedroom when nick moves out for school. because that is exactly what we were thinking, right? then she tried to pull up a picture on the website, but the computer wasn’t working, so she went to find the catalogue, she left for a few minutes but said “i will find you.” how ominous is that? and she did find us! she kept pushing this one dresser and kept saying things like “are you serious about this piece?” and “i bought the lingerie chest.” then she kinda pardoned herself again and it just so happened that we were near the bathroom, i told kevin i was going to use the restroom and i would meet him near the bedroom furniture. i noticed her presence behind me, but i though that she would go through the personnel door that was also near the bathroom. i had a fleeting thought of “she wouldn’t follow me into the bathroom?” SHE DID! not only did she follow me in, she proceeded to talk to me while we both used the facilities. i don’t go into the bathroom to have idle conversation with a crazy vulture type saleswoman, i really do not care that fall is her favorite time of year, not that spring is bad because she talked about that too. and how rude is it that someone i just met is talking to me about what i did today and that we should really go hiking today. i wanted to say “lady, this conversation has made me VERY uncomfortable, and if you think that talking to me/following me into the bathroom is going to help you make a sale, you have another thing coming!” when i finally weaseled out of that situation, i went and found kevin and told him that she was talking to me in the bathroom, he just kept apologizing. for the next ten minutes or so she was here and there trying to get a price for this dresser that she knew we needed. finally she came back with an obscene price and we said, well thanks but no thanks, but that wasn’t good enough. she wanted to know what our budget was and then she called kevin “sweetie” at that point i hear “lets get out of here hun” and as we leave she rolled her eyes and walked away completely disgusted. i wanted to say “that was for following me into the bathroom!”

p.s-i will never set foot in that store again

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